Starting work again soon

Hello everyone,

I know it's been a while since my last blog. But, here I am again! Today I have had a talk with my chef about returning for work, starting half days. It was a very mixed talk and somehow left me feeling kinda unworthy and strange. I guess some things were bothering him and well, seeing I cost him money due to being on sickleave both now and two and a half years ago...he needs someone to "blame" part of it on. Telling me the last few weeks of my work before surgery were below my standard... Did he ever think it might be due to the fact that sitting and walking alone hurted me? I did my best and now I feel like my best wasn't good enough. That somehow I failed in many ways. But it's not like I had much choice with the hip stuff... And now he also told me that when I am fully returned, we'll have roulating shifts that also include the evenings and Saturdays... Now I do not mind working in the evenings, but the Saturday is when I do my groceries and when I meet up with my friends which I can't see during the weekdays. Both George and Joyce have to work in the evenings so that isn't a big problem. It's just that all these years, Saturday was my day off... Weekend you know? Ah well, I am not fully back yet, first see how next week will be going... And on top of that he also informed me there might be a chance that I will have to work through him for other Supers in order to keep me working... I feel very much confused now, like I really did something bad to offend him or so... It makes me sad and a little mad at the same time. But I'll just have to wait and see how things are going next week. But the main thing that really hurt me was, that he told me I was one of the reasons things weren't going too well with the store, because mainly through me he had a high sickleave rate! I even work when I have a slight fever! I never asked for all these troubles... Never wanted it to happen.

But well, with all these mixed feelings... I guess I'll have to cope... Somehow...

Ah well, I guess I'll leave it at that for now. Sending much love to everyone!
Cynni xx