Hello everyone,

here I am, again. In about two hours I will have to leave the house to get to my therapy. It has snowed last night, about 5 cm (1,5 inch) of snow has covered all of Cuijk. So when I woke up around 9:45 this morning, I got dressed, got my snowboots on and took our little doggie out for a walk. I do believe that George has done the same before he went to work, but with all the snow, I saw a nice picture opportunity. So I made some pictures of the snow in our area and of course of Chance in it. I will upload them to my photobucket shortly and then share them with you all here in my blog.

I am now watching a Medium DVD (season 2) and trying to upload my pictures and add some video's to my photobucket. And I am trying to plan an interactive game weekend with some friends. But that seems quite a job to be. So I do hope we can find a date on which (most) people can join in.

I will post this blog now and come back when I have some pictures to show you.

Much love, ta-ta for now,
Cynni xxx

A whole new year

Hello everyone,

First of all: best wishes and all the best to all of you for 2009! Hopefuly all in good health and of course with loads of fun!

Just 8 more days to go and then finally we'll be taking the mini-vacation. I am really looking forward to it, it's been such a long time and I really could use a change of scenery. Being at home has some advantages, but after a while, it can drive you nuts. You feel like the walls are coming at you and that is why I am really looking forward to our small trip to Center Parcs Hochsauerland, Germany. I soooo hope there'll be snow for George and Joyce to ski on, and for Chance to play in (with me making pictures of course) I'll pack some books, my journal, laptop and psp and OF course my bikini and ready I am. Ok ok, warm clothes are welcome as are some things one wishes to eat and drink. I'm sure we can shop there as well, but some things I'd like to bring from home so I'm sure what we've got it to use!

I am now waiting for Joyce and George to come home from the fitness. I backed them some bread (it was pre-baked, no worries!) and I did my best on hoovering the livingroom and hall. Chance leaves a trace of many dark hairs... Now both Chance and Brutus are sleeping nicely in Chance's big bed (*yay for that*). I am having a cup of tea and reading Yvonne's "Twilight" book. Chapterfour now Yvonne ;-)

Last night we played Buzz on the PS3 (I finally found a PS3 version, it was sold out everywhere I asked so far) and it was fun. I kinda kicked both Joyce and George's @$$€$ so that was pretty cool... Ha ha! Then Joyce and I played some Guitar Hero World Tour. Me on the guitar and Joyce working the drums. We still suck though, only on a beginners level for me and Joyce is still practasing on easy with the drums. It is fun nevertheless and we do hope to become as good as some of our friends are (Gin, we hail Gin!)...

Ah well, back to waiting for my lovers and back to my tea before it's cold.

Ta-ta for now everyone!
Love, Cynni xxx

Goodbye 2008...
Welcome 2009!!!

Hello everyone,

welcome to my last blog of 2008. Almost done with this year, happpy times and sad times, difficult moments and also moments that are priceless have passed within the last twelve months.

I have been writing a flashback to 2008 in my journal. I bought it especially with that reason in the back of my mind. Reflect on myself and on the things that I've done and also were done to me. Many sad moments passed while I was writing, but also many things that made it worth while. A summery of 2008:

• End of January: hip troubles starting again.
• Early February: found the reason of my pain => no more cartilage between the bones.
• March: Joyce had a car accident and many things went not as I wanted them to go.
• April: first consult in Gent, Belgium, giving me some more hope for a BHR, with more tests to be done in the end of April and early May.
• April 30th: Joyce moving out of Zevenbergen and into our home in Cuijk.
• May 10th: Joyce and I celebrate our birthdays together. Joyce's family boycots it, giving her much pain.
• May 11th: my real birthday... George got drunk the night of the 10th on the 11th and threw up on me... Joyce got a nasty bugbite in her foot and I could go to the first aid center with her.
• Early June: our two German friends Swantje and Katha visited us for the weekend.
• June and July: the pain is getting worse, I've been walking with a crutch ever since the end of May and in the end of July I officially start working half days.
• August and September go by without any vacation plans...
• October 15th: my BHR surgery in Gent, Belgium. The surgery went OK but the hospital was NOTHING alike the Dutch ones and I so wanted to get out of there....
• October and November I've been living in the livingroom, bed and all. The muscleaches were bad and sometimes I felt really sick of all of it. BUT I went on, knowing I would be able to succeed.
• Now: I still have muscleaches that keep me awake at night. But I am still not giving up and I will succeed for sure.

BUT

I would not have been albe to go through this all without the love, care and support from people who care about me! THANK YOU to all of you, I guess you will know who you are *wink*.

Also a thank you to all old and new friends who accept me for who I am *big hug*!

In January we will finally have a short break, the first one since a week in Texel, October 2007! For 5 days we'll be "living" in a Center Parcs cottage, Hochsauerland, Germany. Hopefully there will be snow, since Joyce wants to learn how to ski. George is already good on them and they would be happy with snow. Mum is coming along as well. So when Joyce and George are in the cold, we'll do the grocery shopping and we'll visit the jaccuzi's in the Dome *smile*. Just 5 days taking it easy and not sitting at home the whole time. Some people think of being home on sick-leave is like being free from work. Yeah, I don't have to go to work. But not because I don't want to, but because I can't do my job yet. I am still doing my exercises and going to therapy and working on making my body like me again. I've walked "wrong" ever since the end of 1996. All the surgeries I've had did make my life a bit more easy, but my body had to get adjusted to the new situation each time. And this time, after 11 years, my right foot is facing forward, not outwards! But that also means my whole posture has changed and that is what's giving me all the muscleaches. Yeah I can walk again, better than before, but when I stop, my muscles all tell me that they really did not like it. But I have to keep going, they need to be able to adjust to the new way that I walk and live.

Ah well....

I am wishing you all a very good end of 2008 and a freakingly mad and terrific good start of 2009!

May all (y)our dreams for 2009 come true

Take care everyone,

Love Cynni xxx

Hello everyone,

here I am again. I "already" fixed two of the images. Will try to fix the other ones as soon as possible as well... I am working on it :D

Thanks for your patience!

Hello everyone!

After not using my account here for over two years (I see the links to the added pictures also died) I am back. I had my own hosted blog, but due to a change in providers, I lost it all... So I decided to use a webhosted blog again. It has some options that I loved on my own blog, so back to this blogspot account.

I know my WHOLE site has been affected because of the change. I am trying to get everything working again for sure, but some items already took alot of time the first time around so they will need a lot of time now as well. Please be patient with me...I am doing ALL I can...

Have a good 2009 everyone! I will be back to blog for sure!

Love,
Cynni xxx

Pictures of the past

Looking at the cupboard
pictures of the past
memories that are loved
times that we remember
Times that linger
weighing on us
times that have been
and never can be again
Pictures are fading
sun shinging
through the window
though the memories remain
Black and white
silver frames glimmering
wooden frames adding style
colour pictures in between
If only it were possible
to let the pictures move
just like in the movies...

Learning

When I was just a little girl,
I started to crawl before I walked,
when I was walking I would fall,
scrape my knee,
get up,
cry,
get a bandaid,
and happily walk on.

When I was 16 years young,
I started to have trouble,
could not walk without pain,
leg moving,
tears dwelling,
cry,
go to the hospital,
end up with surgery.

When I was almost 18 years,
I could walk and run again,
no more pain while doing so,
running,
laughing,
smiling,
everywhere I wanted,
I went.

Now I am 25 years old,
learning to walk again,
again surgery on my hip,
crawling,
crying,
trying,
learning to do the simple things,
so many take for granted...

Angels

As I look
as I feel
as I live
my life

You support
you care
you are
my every day angel

It is you I think of
while dreaming
while waking up
while living

Your wings
glowing in the sun
your fading smile
while you fly away

Even with you
high up in the sky
I feel your pressence
your ever lasting love

April 4th 2006, Cynthia